Still waiting...

Friday 02.10.09

It's October already!! I have no idea where the past 8+mths have flown, but life sure has come a long way. In January i didnt think i'd be single again, let alone pregnant. Now i've overcome the heartache of James leaving (and in all honesty, he did me a big favour by leaving!) and i'm only a couple wks away from being due to have this beautiful baby growing inside of me. I'm feeling huge of course, and can't wait to fit into all my old clothes again and start losing all this excess weight i'm carrying.... but i dont think i'm quite ready for this pregnancy to be over at the same time.

The drs at Antenatal clinic are evil and don't seem to care the slightest about my worries of having a big baby etc. I came home from an appt nearly 2wks ago and just cried. The female dr i saw was just nasty and not the least bit sympathetic at all. I sure hope i never have to see her again lol. After making a complaint about the way she treated and spoke to me, i vented my frustrations and anger to the girls on my Due in October message board and the wonderful Australian lady i've formed a friendship with ordered and sent me the book "Supernatural Childbirth"..... OMG this book is incredible!!

Once i started the book i couldn't put it down. 2hrs after first opening the book i had read the entire thing and even highlighted all the parts i want to remember and re-read while i'm in labour. It's completely changed the way i've been thinking and viewing this whole pregnancy and birth. Now instead of being fearful and worried, i'm excited and eagerly awaiting the birth. I can't wait for it to happen and to just let God take control of the situation and help this baby arrive safe and sound.

I have another ultrasound on Monday to check Xavier's size again and see just how big he is at "full term". I'm curious to see how big he's gotten in the past 4wks since the last scan. It'll be my last chance to get a peek at him before he arrives, so it will be nice. Plus i'll be more prepared for how big he may be (tho they can be out by as much as 400g or so - either more or less than bub really is). I can't believe i'm down to the last few wks of being pregnant, so i'm trying to enjoy it as much as i can before its all over with. Soon it wont just be me and Kailee - there's going to be another little person in the house :D

I'm still in shock that by the time this month ends, i'm gonna be mummy to 2 kids, not just 1. I'll be back in the land of nappy changing, breastfeeding, baby spew, crying, sleepless nites - and i'm looking forward to it. Kailee is getting excited and can't wait for her baby brother to be here and tells me each day all the little things she'll teach him and do with him. She'll definitely make a wonderful big sister - i cant wait to get pics of them both :)

I'll update again after my scan next week and my antenatal appt (since they're weekly now).... xxx